Some time ago, when I was still living in Manchester, I had just finished my shift at work and I was standing on the metro platform. It was raining hard and my tram had not turned up- it was getting dangerously close to the last tram of the night, and the one heading to my destination had still not been listed on the departure board.
I noticed a girl, around my own age, standing at the other end of the platform looking as anxious as I was feeling. I went up to her and asked if she was waiting for the same tram as I was- and it turns out she was. We ended up chatting for the rest of the wait, even sharing the 1/3 of a terrys chocolate orange I had left in my bag from my break at work. And when we finally managed to get on our tram, we kept talking all the way back to her stop which was before mine. Infact, we had such a good conversation that one of the metro staff joined in and even thought that we had already been friends for a while, because me and the girl (who it transpired was a Slovakian anthropology student- which led to another tangent of conversation) were talking so openly and honestly with each other.
By the time I got home, I had had some time to mull over the experience. In past similar situations, I have often enjoyed creating myself a new identity and making them much more exciting and intriguing than my true self, knowing that in all likelyhood that I will never meet the person I was lying to again, and they wouldn't ever be able to (or even attempt to) look into whether or not I was telling the truth. To me, it was just some harmless fun. An acting exercise or practice at lying. I often found that the conversations in which I pretended to be a 'better' version of myself were never very long - and were never very satisfying to me, as I never made a real connection with anybody.
But in this case, I was telling the truth. And I am certain that she was also being truthful- and it hit me that I don't need to make things up about myself to make myself intersting; and if people have enough self-respect then they shouldn't either. If you want to be interesting, you usually are. And even if you haven't done many interesting things, you can still be interesting to talk to. Persuing an interest makes you interesting, even if it is only persuing it in reading.
But its amazing to think that two people, who have never met, and likely never will again can make that sort of a simple, but honest connection. It is the stuff of indie-movies, and novels filled with their heroes and heroines finding what they're looking for when they have all but given up on it. But its real. And that's what counts.
The next time I find myself on a rainy platform, close to midnight, hoping for a tram that I don't know if it will come, I will look around and hope she is, by some coincidence there to keep talking to.
But then again, if she was... would that spoil it? what we had the first time? it was bittersweet and true. And though its not as if we were romantically connected or anything, but the situation was romantic in the poetic sense of the term. And of course that means it has to end in a forever or in a tradgedy. But I think I'm ok with that really. Who knows- maybe we'll bump into each other again some time. But shamefully, I cannot remember what she looked like. So if you're reading this, Veronika, let me know!
What about you? Have you ever had an experience like this? Let me know in the comments :)
Today, this is me:
See you tomorrow,
-Rosa
x
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